Your opportunity to win an I-pad – and make a full-power start to the year. Challenge Four – Radical Honesty
Ok, so we’re almost half way through the Knowledge Source Power Challenge – your opportunity to set a cracking start to the year and win some great prizes.
But half-way in, I’m realising that my writing is crap. Or my ideas are crap. Or my understanding of the crooked-timber of humanity is crap.
We had 400 people sign on to challenge one. By Challenge Three, we’re down to 93.
Classic. Don’t worry. I’m not taking it personally. It’s actually better than I expected. I know it’s hard to follow through. It’s one of the biggest challenges we face – to take initial bursts of enthusiasm and sustain them over strategic courses of action – even if it’s just eight 5-minute challenges.
But it’s not too late. If you did the first challenge but I haven’t followed it up, I challenge you to complete the rest of the challenge. All I’m asking for is 40 minutes this month.
Do it.
Ok, so this is where we are at so far:
Challenge Three: Take the reins
Challenge Four: Radical Honesty (You Are Here)
Challenge Five: LOCKED
Challenge Six: LOCKED
Challenge Seven: LOCKED
Challenge Eight: LOCKED
So today’s challenge is around honesty.
Now honesty is a virtue. It is it’s own reward. But I’m not interested in the effect it has on our higher psyche or whether it increases our chances of getting through the Pearly Gates or what not.
Today, I’m only interested in one thing: efficiency.
My holiday reading was ‘Principles’ by Ray Dalio – the most successful hedge fund manager in the world, and in history.
Mostly it’s about the debt cycle, but Dalio also talks about how he manages his team. One of the principles he uses there is ‘radical honesty’.
At first I was like, whoa. That sounds pretty extreme, flower child. But the point Dalio makes is that we can waste an awful a lot of time faffing about and dancing around the truth.
So say someone in your team is underperforming, or has a way of talking that alienates others in the team.
You could dance around it and hope the situation improves, or you could practice radical honesty and hit it head on.
“Look, Ted. I can see your rubbing some people up the wrong way. Can we talk about that?”
And maybe that doesn’t go well. Maybe Ted freaks out and trashes the break room. But Dalio makes the point that whatever happens, it’s better than spending months or even years in a sub-optimal situation, just hoping things improve.
To practice radical honesty you have to stand fully in what you want, and you have to be prepared to fight for it, or at least have a few awkward conversations.
It is a commitment to keep moving forward and to never let a fear of uncomfortable situations delay or derail you from your dreams.
It is a commitment to efficiency.
So this is your challenge today:
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
So it might be something like. a. I haven’t told my husband that his ideas for the renovation are dumb. b. Because he gets a bit touchy about that stuff and I don’t want to freak him out.
Or it might be something like, a. I haven’t told my mother-in-law that her chicken korma is rubbish. b. Because it is good that she comes around and helps with the kids, and I don’t want to seem ungrateful.
Now, I’m not going to tell you to go out and write them a letter or anything. I’ll leave it to your innate wisdom and social skills to figure that situation out for yourself. I get that it’s complex.
All I want to do today is identify a natural tendency we all have – to dance around the truth.
And all I want for you this year is that if you are going to dance around the truth, that you do it consciously. That you are aware that you are doing it.
And maybe, bit by bit, we can all start doing it less.
*** BONUS CHALLENGE ***
Radical honesty is a great thing to bring to your relationships, but it’s most powerful application is with ourselves. We are born masters of self-deceit, but growth is only possible when we face our sh!t and deal with it.
So as a bonus challenge complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
Even the most awesome people we have ever met have their quirks and their challenges. I can guarantee that you do too.
But can you identify what your most public failings are? This is harder than it sounds…
HIT THE BLOG (Comments Below)
So that’s it. Scroll to the comments b
Radical Honesty Challenge
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Felicity says
I am very aware that in the area of business I dance around the truth because I have a very strong dislike of confrontation. I’m a people pleaser. Ugh.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I am not living up to my full flipping awesomeness right now. Time to pull out the proverbial digit and step completely into my true state instead of allowing fear to hold me back.
Chevy says
Good morning,
So we start with radical honesty
A) my partner leaves just little things laying around the house which absolutely annoys, and I would just let it go, let it go and it go to me so it was a very awkward conversation, and I which lead to heated words which lead to ignoring each other for a short period and then lead to I’m sorry conversation and I kisses and better evening and now he picks his things up… Yahhhhh winning.. I love him so much I just sometimes having this radical honest thing is a new craze ppl need to start using.. I REALLY WORKS #B) and well upsetting him but it it did was upset everytime I had to do it and it’s not my responsibility to clean the little things that we are able to do for ourselves.. Did I mention I love him very much lols. And C) I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I’m annoying cause I can whinge a lot in little burst moments so thats my way of pushing myself to get through my whibgning moment like pushing through a workout that I dislike… Lols so thank you for listening and here to a more honest and efficient year a head xx have beautiful day
Edwirn says
My partner speaks too loud and aggressively when challenged on anything that she says, I have been avoiding telling her about this shortcoming. Will sit down over a cuppa and bring this up and offer a better way of making a point.
Aaron says
I kid myself about my eating habbits. They are not as healthy as i’d like to believe they are.
What was stopping me from tackling it directly was that I was ashamed of myself for not doing better and for not being honest.
I’ve since started making all my own food, i don’t carry cash and give any spare change to my kids. Therefore anything i spend on snacks goes on the credit card and is there to remind me everytime i check the statement.
Claire says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I’m not honest about my eating habits outside of the house
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Because I am ashamed of the behaviour and I know my husband will give me a hard time about it
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I swear a lot (unintentionally), and don’t always think before I speak
Andrew Grotherr says
I am dancing around the truth regarding time management. I believe I’m on top of things but am generally running behind…
Me myself and I are preventing me from owning my time management… I need to say no more…
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because, from time to time I do not meet my own timeframes for deliverables…
BTW I am consciously working on this ready in 2019 by saying no and providing timeframes that meet my workloads and not my Clients sometimes unreasonable time expectations…
nev pape says
i let everyone think my business is doing well and im not in the crapper. (including my self.) but i feel its a loosing battle. as fighting banks and to many projects to sort out at home and work it as i don’t have much back up i have pulled the finger out many time and got on with job but am starting to tire of banks and government taking and taking and putting stoppers on my life. im giving it one last go before im to old to have a go .
Gil says
My A &B have only just come to light so I think they are still relative.
A. I have danced around the truth when a co-workers husband propositioned me and I did not tell her as I knew it would hurt her.
B. Big mistake – I finally told her – to my detriment as she now pours all of that hatred for her estranged husband into me. Very uncomfortable workplace relationship. Hopefully time will heal that.
Despite all of this, I am totally awesome, however I know I can be annoying in that I tend to ramble when a short succinct story would be enough.
Reece Wenzel says
My house mate leaves the kitchen sink dirty every time he washes up – i dont say anything because I dont want to be confronting and seem nitpicking….. (sounds silly when you write it down!!) *FACE PALM*
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because… I am over organised and hate spontaneity. I need to know whats happening and when 95% of the time.
Phil Pollard says
I dance around a conversation about my step-daughters unacceptable behaviour to avoid a conflict with my wife.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can find a joke in just about everything”
Jody Chambers says
Shit yeah Phil, annoying cause your too damn happy……quality problem!
Phil Pollard says
Ha …. true!
Jim says
a. I’m afraid to take the next step with our portfolio because I lost us about $25k out of the last deal we did and it took us 2 years to get out under that rock. Because I did not follow Dymphna”s feaso process properly.
b. Follow the process properly and get other deals rolling with Finance partners and move on.
Bonus Challenge
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” I tend to be a bit pushy to get an answer out of them. (bunch of woosy avo smashing bunch of vegan pretending man bun folks the lot of them)
Andrew Marcos says
a. I haven’t spoken to my staff about how I feel they are under performing and leaving tasks not quite complete.
b. because I am worried they will quit and then I will have to all the work myself instead of the last bit.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I get frustrated and speak rudely to them when they don’t deserve it.
Lisa says
A. I’m not honest about wanting to live overseas for a period of time when the kids get a bit older.
B. What stops me is we are bound to our business here.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I procrastinate about doing thing perfectly instead of just getting it done” And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Kris Anderson says
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I tend to do things without consulting other people first.
HP says
a. Doing my filing
b. I don’t have the time
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I ask too many questions
Michael says
a) I dance around the tidiness and cleaning of my house
b) What is stopping me addressing it is that I’d rather be out doing life rather than home more to police the young adult children at home
Heather Wilson says
I dance around the truth with my husband/business partner about playing games on the computer instead of completing tasks.
I don’t confront this as he will sulk for days thus getting less completed.
I am awesome but l annoy people by talking too much and not getting to the point quickly.
Vera says
I dance around the truth that I have time to do my ironing but I would rather not.
What is stopping me is – I don’t like being at home alone so would rather be out or sleeping
I am awesome but I annoy people by over analyzing everything.
Mike Day says
A. I’m telling myself I’m excited and ready to take action of branding my new property development company and committed to getting the website up and logo sorted. Truth I’m dancing around is I have no clue what to put as content.
B. What’s stopping me is fear that’s it’s shit and I won’t be able to attract investors and of the rejection. I know there will be plenty of knock backs in setting this up but I’ve been procrastinating for a few months now despite knowing what to do. I just need to sit down and do it already and quite dancing around the truth which is my fear and hit this head on and get it done. I know things like a website can be changed and updated and made better and are very dynamic piece of your branding image. But yet it’s not my strong suit so I’m waffling about.
Bonus challenge
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…..I sometimes give too much detail as I’m a details personally and find it hard to leave out details others don’t want. So they get annoyed at having to listen to detail they don’t need or want. Short and sweet. Clear and consice. I struggle with this skill.
Chris says
I dance around the truth when it comes to committing fully to my goal of having my own property business. I let little unimportant distractions side track me from what I really should be focussed on – that is putting together an action plan and sticking to it within a set time frame to free me up from my 9 to 5. The thing stopping me is my own fears – fear of failure, fear or success, fear of the unknown and fear of what others will think.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can sometimes be too direct and say things that come out different to the intent behind it.
Belinda says
I found this challenge quite difficult, Jon, as I pride myself on facing truths head on. But we can always dig deeper, and as I dug I discovered more truths.
I dance around my sister. I love her so hard and want to protect her and so I struggle to be direct with her around anything she might perceive as critical. She’s had a rough few years, has not fostered a positive headspace and is not living her potential. I resolve to have more fearless conversations with her exploring possibility.
I know I am pretty flipping awesome, but I annoy some people because I can be very directive and short when trying to get things done or leading a task, and I know this can be interpreted as lacking compassion or manners.
Simon says
A. I have quite bad OCD that I can’t actually manage on my own
B i am not attacking it directly because I am not brave enough to make the first move and talk to someone about it.
Bonus: am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can be too particular about some things and won’t let the little issues slide past without making a big deal about them
Belinda Helps says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I struggle to charge my clients a cancellation fee for late cancellation or no show, especially if they are usually a reliable regular
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I’m not good with awkward conversations and I hate confrontation. Some people can get really nasty and they are the one’s in the wrong. It makes me angry that they think I should be at a loss for their mistake. I see it as lack of respect for my time.
Steve says
a) I’ve been dancing around the truth with my friend of a few years who has lots of challenges in her life and dramatic mood swings from depression to euphoria and not much balance in between. I want her to be happy and successful but what I’ve been dancing around for some time is the feeling that constantly supporting her is becoming too much for me and it wears me down.
b) What is stopping me from addressing it is that her best friend from many years ago all of a sudden stopped communicating which caused her so much stress and anxiety and I don’t want to do the same and potentially cause great harm.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people, particularly those walking behind me because I tend to have a lot of wind and don’t believe in holding it in to the point of stomach cramps. So when outdoors I just let it rip and hope everyone around has a blocked nose and is as deaf as me.
Brett Kershaw says
Hahaha
I love the fact that you can let it rip outside
THERESIA JORDANS says
I have that problem too.Scared to bend over in case… Went to a dietician today and hope that a better diet will help. .Due to a background in nursing I know it will. Its just that I have been too lazy/unmotivated to cook proper meals and/or eat enough fibrous vegies or drink enough water. Good luck.
Eric says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
Talking to my wife about business or investment things.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
She doesn’t like investing as she thinks it is gambling and that I’ll lose all our money. She gets upset every time I talk about it or spend any money.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
I’m so laid back. I don’t take things too seriously when maybe I should sometimes.
Gary says
Well I know I have been procrastinating about setting up proper investment structures before my next deal. I read the challenge and before even completing it I made the phone call and got the information and documentation set out. They are now in the in box. 🙂
It maybe fear or simply self doubt. But the challenge has brought me to action.
I know I can be awesome but I have trouble saying it. I know my energy and thinking out of the box annoy some of the people closest to me. But here’s to being more honest, a bit more sensitive and having a more efficient and action packed year.
Peter Gron says
Eric has hit the nail on the head with item a. Talking to my wife about business or investment things.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Despite the success I’ve had she focuses on the few bad investments, the bad advice, the lost money – it’s just that the bad ones are the last two I’ve done, caused largely by APRA and bad advice. She not only gets upset every time I talk about doing something else, but her stress levels rise, blood pressure rises and she becomes aggressive and bad tempered. If it was just that then we could cope but the lack of work and associated income makes it all that much worse.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because of my radical honesty which comes across as the blunt approach. I know this is a problem I have and I have been working on it (and I think I’m getting better at it), but I still need to pick my battles.
Sue says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
• “Not Taking control of the reins with priorities”
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
• Other demands get in the way, from myself and others.
• Commitment
• Fear of pain, failure, success
“I am pretty flipping awesome, I know I annoy some people because I don’t do as I am told and I care too much about other people’s opinions/feelings. And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Shirley says
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I am too blunt and direct. I go into coaching mode without the other person’s agreement and they resent the comments I make.
Sue says
A – I am dancing around the truth of my job. I would like to leave my job and get one I like.
B- what stops me from tackling this is the fear of not getting another part time job that pays as well and ihas flexible working arrangements like my current job. I am scared no one will hire me with only 5 years left until retirement
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
I procrastinate too much, have good intentions that I don’t always follow through with.
Meg Hogan says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth. My neighbour pulled apart a section of our fence (the corner post that had some rot in it but still was intact and has cemented over the hole where it went in) and now it is 5 weeks and our fence is still not repaired. We have animals that may escape or be harmed or every the integrity of the fence might cost more with not being supported.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly. My neighbours complained and stopped talking to us when I told them their dogs were barking from 11pm-5am every day that they were not there, what can we do to help them quieten down. If the effects were this dramatic over kindly asking how to help them, I worry what will occur when I get heavy demanding they fix the section of fence they pulled apart.
Bonus Challenge
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because… I come over as strong in my tone.
Tracy D says
a: Dancing around the truth of telling my son he needs to get a job. Ok Im telling him, but Im not making it hard for him as I still give him money when he needs it because I want him to follow his dream of being a musician.
b. I dont want our relationship to suffer and I dont want to look back and think he didnt have enough of a chance to build up what he really wants to do.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I dont always say what I think, but when I do I am told that I am too blunt (I call it assertive)!”
Drew Andrea says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I don’t really push myself very hard when it comes to physical exercise, despite all the excuses
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Good question! Laziness & fear of the commitment, not being able to follow through?
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I’m not always sensitive to others choices
Mark O'Brien says
A work issue has to be faced up to; difficult b’c they’re in a tough place (circumstantially)& may leave ; not a good thing considering their loyalty and contribution.:- they need positivity and ability to change.
I am pretty awesome BUT I can procrastinate and drag out the action particularly in regards to new tech stuff.
Andres says
a) I am dancing around the truth regarding time management at work. I just work work and work. However always I am behind… I am a schedule person however the time to do a task always take more that I have expected.
b) So I will be more realistic, and focus in only one task at the time. So, I will not be overwhelming with the rest of the things in my agenda.
Bonus Challenge
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” I tend to be a bit persistent with my requests to do something… So the way i am telling you to do things is the best! However, I should be more open mind and be able to see another opinions and even other options…
Malcolm Gibson says
a) Not being real about my lack of fitness and low health level.
b) I think it will be painful and strenuous to change. Lacking in purpose to change anything in my life.
I know I am awesome but I know I annoy some people by being a control freak and not being flexible or seeing the other persons point without judgement,
tammy says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
Addressing finance’s, I’ve tried the patient encouragement approach dancing here and there, beating this bush and that bush but time is a wastin so I just gotta rip that band aid off and address it again.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Don’t wanna come across like a total ball buster.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because – I tend to have a higher expectation of myself and where i should be in life and beat myself up for prior investment mistakes made in the past which have set me back”. I will work on that!
michael johnson says
My wife just doesnt have the mindset to be a property investor.
.When I try to discuss it and what she needs to think differently about to succeed in property investing it invariably leads to the ‘ok we can split then…..’
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because i am not very outgoing
THERESIA JORDANS says
Seems like a blame game about OTHERS not your own honesty.
Victoria Mizzi says
I dance around the truth with my property business, just getting it happening.
What’s stopping me is fear, of what I don’t know, maybe looking stupid or unprofessional, not getting it right. And I worked out on a previous challenge how necessary being right is to me. I’ve set up the structures (legally) and purchased the tools, but am having trouble using them, and getting the information I need from the Council – their information is so waffley on line, and not much better over the counter. So I procrastinate, do ‘busy work’, read manuals, books, articles, as long as it has business relevance, then I can justify it as ‘work’. I’m embarrassed to share this with my husband.
I’m pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I talk too much and often blurt out tactless things – verbal diarrhoea and foot & mouth disease !!!
Jody Chambers says
A. I bullsh#t myself that I’m quite good at this share investing thing
B. My portfolio tells me differently, it’s like the fool scorecard without the big winners.
Bonus
I annoy people because I work hard and save my sugar so I can have several months off a year and relax and support the barley, hops and sugar (and beef) farmers of Australia by consuming their product’s.
Jeen says
Where I dance around the truth and why:
I find it difficult to tell members of my elderly family that I want or need things NOW because I don’t like feeling like I’m being ruthless and callous, but sometimes, it’s also my pride that stops me. I don’t like telling people that they are wrong to avoid conflict and confrontation. I also find it hard to interrupt people and to STOP conversation – particularly with elderly people as I don’t want to be rude and uncaring.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because they find me too long-winded when I am recounting something with detail. So now, to people that don’t matter, I keep it superficial and short.
THERESIA JORDANS says
Maybe you could try keeping it short and simple with people who DO matter, and long-winded with people who don’t matter so that they are kept at arms length?? Just sayin’.
Deb says
a. I don’t handle conflict well
b. Because I’m way too worried about what others think (yet do they care what others think?)
“I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I let others take advantage of my good nature……and I sometimes talk too much…….”
Al says
a. I’m not honest about the way my other half wastes money.
b. I’m too afraid of the likely reaction (especially since I’m prone to waste as well)
I’m pretty awesom, but I know I annoy people because:
1) I’m also too long winded in telling stories;
2) I tend to say too much
3) I tend to be indecisive.
Mal Barrett says
a. I am not sure that some of my business activities are going to pay off but I have persisted with them for the last 12 months
b. So much time and effort has been invested into establishing start-ups that it is hard to let them go, therefore admitting defeat
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can be brutally honest and tend to tell it like I see it, which most people find very confronting.
andrew says
I am dancing around refinancing a few deals that are cross secularized which is stopping me from moving forward safely.
I feel like I’m constantly behind the eight ball when it comes to preparing all the docs to get cracking on fixing this. I keep using excuses like the royal commission into banking and so on .
I am flipping awesome but I do annoy some people because I do tend to tell them how they can fix their financial woes by investing in property too much.
JOHN says
I dance around the truth about my ability in analysing Company books in deciding whether to buy their shares.or not.
Follow my mentors advice more often, who is very patience with me and answers all my questions.. Improve my finances out of sight.
I am flipping awesome but I do annoy some people because I do tend to come up with too many solutions to a problem. Keep it simple stupid. ‘Kiss Theory.’ .
Ian Martin says
I dance around the truth in the way that I get things done quickly… I don’t I procrastinate and friends call me roundtoit, I will get round to it….
I need to get my attention focused and tuned in, and I will succeed.
I am flipping awesome, but I do annoy some people in the way that I see things in black and white and this conflicts with some
Matt P says
I’m really struggling to build the confidence to invest in shares again. It’s too easy to blame the ‘mentors’ and educators on previous blunders when I know it was my own fault for thinking ‘she’ll be alright, it will turn’ and not cutting my losses early enough.
I need to face my fears and start with some small capital in the market and get a few small wins under my belt to prove to myself that I’m not a failure.
I am pretty flippin awesome but I know I annoy some people most when I procrastinate about making a decision.
Barbara Lockhart says
One area I am dancing around is the weight I put on when my husband asked for a divorce.
I had put blinders on for over 13 years now, BUT I joined a gym just recently, and I AM doing something about it….if i could just give up chocolate as well….hmm…(I am loving the fact that I do feel more flexible though!)
Bonus challenge….“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I can nag when I feel someone hasn’t heard what I asked them to do or when I haven’t received any acknowledgement that I have even asked….I KNOW I have to be more chilled out, and let it go more often….”
Thanks for making me really think Jon….if anything it has made me more determined to do LESS procrastination about loads of things, and do MORE of what I wish to do for ME to be even more amazing…thanks, Barbara xxxx
Tony (kiwi) says
– Lifé is 5 progressive stages,until finally-DEATH. I am at the 4th stage and running out of time.
– Must get on with stuff and stop this depressing time wasting
I do not mind being annoyingly direct
Matt Lee says
I dance around the truth about my Mother in law feeding my kids so much crap when she looks after them and how much it annoys me.
I don’t say anything because I appreciate her giving up her time to take care of them for me.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because ai talk too much. Not shy of sharing a good yarn when a short answer would suffice.
Stephen Booker says
Even though I’m an architect I really am not only disinterested in my partners renovation desires but I want to spread any work done over a longer period of time than she does.
If I raise the issue or hint at it she throws a tantrum. So I just avoid the issue to avoid the conflict.
I know I annoy some people because I like to work in an ordered setting and spend time cleaning up before getting on with the task. It removes a distraction from my midst.
Eug says
A) My poor sleeping habits over the years are ruining my physical and mental health
B) But I feel that I need to always be taking away from sleep time to achieve my financial goals
C) I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because… they know that I know that I need to take care of myself better.
Karen says
I’m dancing around asking my daughter why she’s always cranky at me. I am avoiding it because either a. She’ll tell me something about myself I don’t want to hear or b. She’ll reveal a side of her personality I’ll find very hard to like. As for me well I’m pretty awesome but I do piss off people by not coming to the point when talking. (Working on that in 2019)
Sally says
I’m dancing around the truth in speaking my mind to my in laws about a few things that concern me (like how little time they want to spend with us and their grandson despite saying that they want to, and about money they owe my husband) I’m finding this hard because a) my husband like confrontation even less than I do, and shuts down every time I mention it or try to discuss options with him of resolving the issues with his dad and step Mum, and b) because I don’t want to cause a rift in his family by speaking my mind because then I’d feel guilty for driving them apart of creating ill feeling.
Bonus question: I’m pretty freaking awesome but I know I sometimes run people up the wrong way cause I’m certain of my stance in areas I’ve researched like health, wellness etc, and I speak my mind openly and apparently I’m not very flexible or open to opinions that differ from my own. I’m working on being more tolerant and allowing, and discussing topics rather than forcing my viewpoint down other people’s throats ?
april kohlmann says
I am dancing around the truth with regards to my dad. He ha a stroke in November and is in stroke rehab. The Doctors there don’t think he can go home as he has lost vision in one eye and therefore could bump into things, fall over and hurt himself, and that should go into a nursing home. The doctors have told him he need 24 hour care but dad thinks that if he tries harder and hides from them most of his vision inflicted difficulties they will let him. I don’t know how to tell dad that he needs to go into a nursing home and have been delaying researching it and finding one.
I am afraid as I don’t want to upset dad and take away his independence and I am not sure that he will see it as the safest option. When ever I hint at it he says if he goes into one he will die. I know that is fear talking and the subject needs to be approached slowly and the fears discussed but it really stresses my out..
David says
I have often had people commenting on my quirks and flaws. Most of the time it is others trying to transfer their own flaws on to me. However, I still listen to what they are saying, see what I can take away from what they are saying and then implement the good stuff into my life.
I am constantly soul searching and improving on myself so that I can become the best person that I can be.
CHRISTINE WHEELER says
No1. I dance around the truth with a couple of things, l make out l can do everything when in reality l feel like lm falling apart and cant do it all. And when issues come up with one of my children l have difficulty in actually telling her the truth about what lm feeling so l just dont get into it.. l need to change both of these and am more concious of when lm doing it.
No2 . I dont attack these things as the first one, l feel like lm failing, no one can help and l dont want to let people down anyway. And the other l am scared of my daughter screaming at me and it being super uncomfortable between us.
Bonus
I am pretty awsome but l know l annoy some people as l say l can do everything but them let them down because l over commit myself and l talk to much.
renata says
i dance around my relationship. my partner is a lovely man but we want different things in life and because im a peoples pleaser i dont do enough thing i want to do, i do too much what he wants. it frustrates the s…. out of me but i find it hard to fight for what i want for the reason my relationship will get worse. ive done it on few occasions and im tired if it, im giving up.
i am pretty flippinga owesome, but i know i annoy some people because i get offended easily ie when i ask for some favour and i see they dont want to do it and they procrastinate, i dont ask again.
EliseGoodman says
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Pete says
I’m dancing around the truth in relationships with a couple of my relatives, going along with what they say even when they’re being unreasonable
I do this because they are so volatile that I want to avoid confrontation and the resulting grudges.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I talk about too many details on topics that don’t interest them.”
Linda says
I am constantly trying to organise the house, at the end of the day I have moved things around but haven’t achieved anything but keep patting myself on the back for DOING SOMETHING.
I can’t attack it because I really don’t know where to start.
Bata says
I would like to have 10 kg less but I like sweets so much and even though I exercise a lot I still have more kilograms than I want. I am on to it now for good.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” I tell them in face what I really mean when they ask me regardless the info is good or not for them.
Hirotaka Yoshida says
I am dancing around the truth that I am not paid enough for what I I do and my actual market value is.
Although I know if I take action, which is being a freelancer I get paid much better and earn money efficiently. What is stopping me is just laziness and fear. I’m not paid enough but at the same time it is easy, no hassle and no need to face fear of failure.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I am not taking action. Some people expecting me to be a fleelancer so they could work with me or do some projects together.
This year I will take bold action!!
Tash says
…. ,but I know I annoy some people because I am, stubborn, lazy, private, I could actually answer this 100 different ways. But what do you, or those people DO with those ‘danced around truths’ anyone else stating the facts or fighting the same fight over and over again but just not listened to?
Shelley says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I have the greatest job in the world with a fun bunch of people but after years of doing the same thing, i’m simply not challenged. I missed out on a promotion last year so my view is that upper management doesn’t have confidence in me. Perhaps it’s time to find a new job.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I fear rejection and ageism. What if i’m not good enough? What if my best if behind me.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I expect a lot including working extra hours to complete tasks. I don’t have a great work life balance and i expect the same of others.
Jeni says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I am not addressing my lack of record skills- it leads to stress and procrastination at tax time .
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I keep my opinion to myself and when people press me I am radically honest and get accused of being tactless/ blunt.
Belinda says
Dancing around fixing my computer issues with GVA program so I can move forward in finding a deal
I guess I’m doing it out of fear of failure, if I can’t find a deal then I can’t fail
Bonus – I get angry pretty easily with my kids which can make things at home a bit tense when husband comes home
Melissa says
A) I dance around, helping two of my adult children, in particular financially, when I have plans and dreams of my own I wish to fulfill. I want to believe the promises that I will be paid back and that they are finally becoming responsible…. just one more little hand up…
B) I’m concerned they will become homeless, starve or the like. The eldest was in that situation many years ago and it hurt my heart when I found out.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I often use an over abundance of words and I like to do hings my way!
Eldon Stevenson says
A, Dancing around the truth with issues related to my sister-in-law’s behaviour / mental health status.
B. Because if anyone in the family tried to attack it directly it would greatly upset my mother-in-law because she insists no one can talk to my sister-in-law about it.
“I’m pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because. . . . I have a tendency to interrupt or talk over people in conversations.” I am aware of it and trying to practice not doing it so much.
William Gilfillan says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
a. I tend to procrastinate and sometimes make excuses by thinking ‘negatively’ about doing something. If I exercise I might ‘strain my back’ or ‘damage’ the disc & knee cartilage and create a lot of pain and ‘head aches’ for myself later. Which can happen sometimes, but not always. Usually the negative thoughts are exaggerated or else not always true.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
b. It is ‘easier’ or more comfortable to make excuses for not doing something & ‘safer’ to do nothing, but then ‘nothing gets achieved’ & that leads to depressing thoughts of ‘inadequacy’ or ‘not being good enough’ to achieve, especially when others are succeeding.
Bonus Challenge: “I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
I am an awesome person, but sometimes I annoy people by taking too long to say something. My challenge is to become more ‘concise’ in what I say & not be so ‘long winded’. I tend to add in too much extra ‘detail’ that may not be needed, even though I find it interesting.
Carlijn White says
I dance around the truth regarding issues with family; I hate confrontation and rather leave things sort them selves out which in fact they never do………
The problem is; the other parties are the same; somehow it works but really; it could work better if we spoke our minds. I remember someone saying; I don’t lie, but if I don’t say what I truly feel, isn’t that a lie also? So, to lie is bad, but not to say what you mean or feel, to be assertive, in spite of the consequences, is a bad thing too and I hate how these unspoken truths keep whirling and acting out in my mind with wonderful and constructive outcomes which never get to see the light of day.
What’s stopping me? Don’t like to step out of my comfort zone, afraid of stepping into the unknown.
Bonus challenge; I am flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I can be too demanding, too organising and speaking and acting before I think.
Benny says
A. I know i’m dancing around the truth when I tell people they are experiencing depressive and negative thoughts because life is just plain old tough…
B. because I don’t want to hurt their feelings by telling them that sitting around at home eating chips and ice-cream in front of the TV isn’t helping, and they would feel so much better, and look at their problems a different way, if they just got up off their arses, did some exercise, ate healthy and started seeing all of the awesomely positive sides to life (like being alive itself!)
I’m pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I don’t like ‘No we can’t’ as an answer, and always encourage them to try and find the ‘how can we’.
Paul Smith says
I know that my property portfolio needs a few changes to make it more self sustainable but I have not been willing/motivated to put the time in to make this happen.
Im pretty awsome but do have a tendency to be a little ignorant of the people around me at times
Rodger Richards says
I dance around the truth with my kids, after I found out about some pretty awful stuff between a couple of them. Now because the truth is not known it has caused a break down between some of them
If the truth comes out it will be devastating on several generations of families
I feel I have to get it out there & stop the bullshit, whatever the consequences
I am pretty flipping awesome & I know I get up people’s noses because I don’t fit in their BOX!!
& I will defend what I believe in ☺
Adam Stone says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth – our property portfolio does not produce anywhere near the cash flow I had planned.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly – an unwillingness (stubbornness?) to sell anything and hold on.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can be slow to act / make decisions.
Marcos Serrano says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
Right now it’s probably my career. I’ve had a couple of big changes over the last few years, and not sure where to take things next. There’s a bit of immediate financial pressure that needs addressing too.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Health and energy levels are probably the biggest barriers at the moment – chronic fatigue, recovering from a serious gut infection, and tin lid #3 landing! It’ll all work out somehow and the answers will become clearer as my physical recovery progresses.
Bonus Challenge, Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
I can get restless quickly – I can ask a lot of questions and sometimes get impatient with people or thins that move slower than I’d like.
Stephen Bathgate says
I am very passionate about protecting the environment but also saving money, where my opinions and attitudes are affecting my family and friends.
Lisa D says
I am dancing around the truth of my smoking flatmate in my non-smoking house. Whilst she doesn’t smoke inside the house, she still comes in smelling of smoke and it feels like a violation of the space.
I have not yet told her to move out because I don’t like confrontation, she’s been helping to mind the dog, and some income is better than none.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…… I have trouble un-cluttering the house and I know it annoys my daughters”
Michael says
Two areas of my life where i am dancing around the truth relates to starting up my own business, and getting rid of working as an employee, AND discussing finances with my wife. What is stopping me in both challenges is my lack of confidence and avoidance of conflict. I love a quiet harmonious environment for relationships, and dealing with these challenges upsets that objective.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because i keep my feelings and opinions to myself.
fiona says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
– Family member hoping the situation will go away or get better!
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
– Feeling like l have failed and scared of the truth.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
– I jump in and get things done 🙂
Tom says
one area: the living situation with my mother-in-law is pretty messed up. She’s in the granny flat but drives me bonkers.
why I’m ducking it: I just don’t know what else to do. I can’t turf her out on the street.
I’m pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because when people say stupid things it annoys me and shows on my face. It makes me bad a small talk.
Mark says
a. Saying i haven’t got enough time o get things done
b. Procrastination
Bonus Challenge
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…
“I Talk the Talk, but don’t always Walk the Walk” ”
And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Jen says
I’m putting off sorting suing builders that I paid but didn’t finish my house. Reason – other priorities and cuz it seems tedious, difficult and expensive. But this is unsustainable, as the statute of limitations will soon run out.
Annoying thing about me – I rail haplessly at people who use the word ‘guys’ around or toward me (it’s unAustralian and I’m not one).
Louise says
a. when i write my action plan for the day and it includes exercise.
b. dad in his demented state wants me to be at his side all day, and i let him have his way.
I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I say I will do something fun with them and let them down finding an excuse to do nothing.
Jane says
a) getting real about future long term financial security for retirement
b) get overwhelmed by the complexities of trying to take a path/s to work towards securing it. Too many options, too much questionable ‘expert’ advice, not enough confidence in myself, afraid I’ll waste money on yet another project/scheme/plan that leads to nothing and leaves us broke in retirement.
I’m pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can appear to be very aloof, which they think is snobbish. I’m an omnivert – you have no idea of the internal dialogue I have with myself in social environments.
Melinda says
a. I am dancing around the truth with my business activities. I feel like a failure because even though I try really hard, nothing seems to be working.
b. I really should focus on one or two things but have spent so much time and effort and money on building/creating businesses that it feels like a waste to walk away. So instead I keep pouring money in and working 24/7.
I’m pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I speak my mind and am very opinionated.
Gilles says
a. I am not telling an employee that she isn’t performing and not up to our standards service
b. She is really sensitive and I work for a big company where I feel I cannot make a mistake in the way I handle the situation.
Bonus Challenge
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I don’t have patience, everything needs to be done now!”
Susanne Kendall says
A. I believe my mother was responsible for me being very over weight as a child. Now feeds my kids rubbish when they are there whilst i am at work.
B. My mother would never see my point or understand why the “treats” and the amount are not acceptable. She would cry and be shitty for the next few weeks. This has happened before.
Bonus: I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can be very black & white not a lot of grey. Also i am sometimes too open about what we are doing to achieve our goals.
Jane Mason says
I am dancing around the truth with myself. I know what I need to do, I know that I am responsible for my effort in and my outcomes out. But I have gotten comfortable in a relationship and seem to be happy to use a cushy lifestyle to be less truthful than I am. Because I am not getting out of bed when I want to, eating what would serve me better, exercising to give the time I need to myself.
I am very extremely flipping awesome, but I annoy my partner because my mind works so fast and the words come so quick and there are so many ways to skin a cat that offering him a million choices to do something in less than 30 seconds is frustrating and the repetition of it becomes annoying.
Sandie says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I’ve always seen myself as a creative person. Well I was when I was much younger- writing, painting, crafts, sewing, but not for many years. Work, family and life just seems to have crushed the creativity in me,or that’s how I feel. The truth is I’m scared it’s gone for good.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I’m still trying to make time for myself, and that is still a lomg way off. I think, that I always put my own needs at the bottom of the list.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I do things by the book, I don’t take shortcuts. I don’t do “she’ll be right”.
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Carolyn says
Putting up with average staff members in my team. Because I dislike confrontation and so find myself settling for the devil I know.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I am a perfectionist – it drives my husband crazy.
Donna says
My sister had a psychosis event several years ago and is not the same since then but she thinks she’s perfectly ok. We dance around trying to tell her what we find she needs to work on because she doesn’t handle critidm well, even if it’s constructive. She made an attempt on her life a while back and now we’re even more afraid to bring issues to her attention because we don’t want to lose her. But she thinks she’s fine and we know she’s not. It’s a drain on our family, particularly my elderly mum. We just don’t know how to deal with it or what to do.
I am awesome but I know I annoy people sometimes because I am not always particularly diplomatic. I hate upsetting people but I sometimes hurt peoples feelings.
Timbo says
I haven’t spoken up when my supervisor ‘goes rogue.’
As there is not a good accountability system in place for him, it’s my word against his.
Fear of lack of management support and fear of recrimination has stopped me from acting.
So, fear.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can be overly sarcastic and cynical.
Brett says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
When it comes to personal family matters I tend to avoid them by keeping quiet
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Upsetting the family member and creating unhappiness
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
I’m way to passive not engaging enough to help or support
Helen says
Radical honesty: Spending too much time dancing around hoarding issues rather than acknowledging and dealing with it directly.
Awesome but…….like to be in control too much with the fine details.
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Chas says
Had a real hard think about this one and I cant think of any. Life motto “Stay true to your self”. Which leads me into the next section –
Im pretty flipping awesome, But I annoy some people because – I speak my mind and often offend people because sometimes its not what they want to hear but if its the truth I’m gonna say it anyways.
Brett Kershaw says
After major surgery just over a year ago I’ve not worked…i managed to lose 20 + kilos but after follow up surgery to correct an issue I’ve been careless about life…not being allowed by the insurance company to go back to the gym means I’ve put 17 kilos back on!
What has stopped me is fear…of being hurt further hernias are a constant issue that needs for me to take a different path
Part 2
I’m ficken awesome as i now have the means to help me regain some balance in life
I’m ficken awesome but i tend to over do it by not thinking through all i nees too
Eva says
a) I have been dancing around the truth within my relationship for a few years now where I have tried to tell my partner what it is that I feel will make me happy – communication and affection – but as he has spent a long time being single, he really relishes his own company and I have wondered out loud why he is wanting to be in a committed relationship.
b) Knowing that this will end the relationship as his needs and my needs are just too far apart.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because.. I let my problems with my relationship “get me down” and steal the energy from other aspects of my life.
Glenn Adams says
One thing that I constantly dance around is the fack that my wife hardly ever takes out the rubbish and when I get home it seems the first thing I see is rubbish that needs to be taken out. I think that I don’t confront the problem head on is, almost every time I am taking it out and thinking, ahhhhh why is this here? Why am I the only one that does this? It hits me my wife has had a busy day at work also and what else would I be doing if not out here taking out the rubbish and maybe stopping to enjoy my garden along the way. At this moment it all seems a bit trivial after that.
Daniel says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth:
I tell my parents and in-laws (overseas) that the business and investments I set up after moving to Australia are going great. Truth is I can barely support my family (everything in Australia is so expensive!)
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I know the business is growing, I know it has the potential to actually be very profitable, I know my one Aussie real estate investment is neutral, but I don´t want to admit that even though moving to Australia was a good decision personally, it has not been as expected financially (at least not fast enough).
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I have a “know-it-all” personality.
Mario says
I procrastinate too much and sometimes take too long to make decisions. This is an area that could really improve my results.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because… I overthink too many issues.
THERESIA JORDANS says
DANCING ROUND THE TRUTH. Not getting things sorted out in and around the house or with my finances – not because I am not capable or too tired but because i want someone to help me to show they care! dancing round the fact that I am lonely.MAYBE another reason I put it all off is because once everything is ‘spic and span’ I will have to face the fact that I am now free to travel but on my own and don’t really want to travel on my own not from fear but from loneliness. I also feel A) it is a waste of time and money because the bank will probably take it from me anyway if/when this help doesn’t work out. and B) it will all benefit somebody else if I lose the house. The finances bit I do feel inept and have sought help which is slow and tedious and seemingly fruitless. The clutter is from ‘can’t-be-bothered-itis’ and feeling depressed. Playing with my mobile looking for ideas for craft or other means of wasting time – avoidance. ALWAYS seem to find time to stuff for other people.
WHEN I do get it all cleared up and the garden looking nice I will be the one who benefits FIRST. Time to put myself first for a change. I can enjoy the freedom of doing the craft stuff etc that I want to do but put off because the place is in a mess. (Guilt free)
With the garden all looking nice and the place spruced up the property would fetch a better price IF the bank forces me to sell/or they sell it from under me.
I’m pretty flippin awesome because people often tell me how good I am at things. I am getting better at accepting praise and learning to say thank you and not denying it so much. Even BELIEVING IT SOMETIMES! Have to work on not saying I am not good at anything, or ‘not good enough’ which is not actually always what I feel but sense that is what others think. As someone once said:- “It is not what others think about me that hurts me, but what I think about what they think that hurts me”.
Jarrod Riley says
Radical Honesty Challenge
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I am not being truthful to myself and others about my diet and general health.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I don’t want others to see my flaws and I just really live eating doughnuts and fried chicken.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I tend to gloss over their emotional reactions to what I’m saying. Seeming insensitive.
Susana says
a. “Like the sun, the inner Self is always shining, but because of negative clouds, we do not experience it. It is not necessary to program oneself with the truth; it is only necessary to remove that which is false.”
b. He goes on to say, “It is only the removal of the negative that is necessary-the willingness to let go of the habits of negative thinking. The removal of the obstacles to the experiencing of this will result in an increasing sense of aliveness and a joy of one’s own existence.”
Sondra Bellert says
1. I dance around the truth by not telling my partner when little things he does annoy or upset me. They eventually accumulate and then I explode.
2. I believe the issues are too petty to addresss and so I put them behind me and get on with life.
3. I can annoy others by being too pushy, strong or opinionated. I should let go and let others discover / learn for themselves.
Geoff says
One area where I dance around is being focused on sorting out our financial well being. Too busy being busy instead of confronting reality and not procrastinating.
Goal: Set clear financial targets and stay the course in spite of any distractions. (New Year Resolution!)
“I am pretty flipping awesome but I know that I annoy some people because I am too direct and don’t consider others feelings often enough when trying to resolve issues. I can see the solution and favour the direct approach.”
Goal: Learn to lead better (be my own coach) and reflect more before voicing my opinion, implementing strategies or taking action.
Scott says
I dance around the truth of getting things done to make our family’s life easier and more abundant, I know the steps to take and what is stopping me from facing them directly is my poor time management, I need to find more time for these things rather than wasting my time on unimportant things, family time comes first than I need to turn the tv off and get S$$T done
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy people because…. I like things perfect or a certain way (my way) and this annoys people, mainly my wife and my dad
Jane says
I’m dancing around the truth that I spend excessive time researching things instead of taking action.
What is stopping me from attacking it directly is the lack of confidence in the knowledge that I initially acquire.
I’m pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I have lots of unfinished projects.
Scotty D says
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because they tell me so…. normally its my kiwi accent 😉
Damian Phillips says
A- I don’t say NO to people and consistently attend to others needs.
B- the thing that stops me directly attacking above problem is I don’t like to see others doing tough
Or being a disappointment.
I know I’m pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people becuase sometimes I am to honest and share my opinion when it goes against others ideas.
David Brown says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
There is a number of areas, that most of us dance around the truth or we add a little white lie, to cover what we have done or trying to complete without anyone knowing. Why my marriage fell apart? Even reading all the signs & problems, plus her not caring to help in all ways than you can imagine. Then working hard to fix this problem, that didn’t wish to be fixed or care. Having a partner with bipolar was hard.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I have moved on or have I, We keep asking ourselves or keep looking back at what it could have been? Walking away from that marriage did hurt, plus been blame that I cause this problem.
1: the past is the past
2: Starting a new chapter of life with a new partner who has the same drive to move forward
3: Starting all over again is hard with limited funds,
You just must believe in yourselves & that light at the end of the tunnel will get bigger!
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” just been positive about living within my means
Nathalie Sarlin says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I am dancing around telling my husband that he really really needs to get to the gym because he’s changed jobs and physical exercise is no longer part of his work and the effects are catching up with hime.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
I don’t do it because I’m worried about him feeling bad because he’s already got a bit of a thing about it because his Dad is morbidly obese and he doesn’t want to end up there.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” I am often right (annoyingly so) and I am not the best listener at times. Working on it though.
Carolyn says
a:not being able to face the truth, tuning out, when talking with my partner. being too lazy, no motivation, constantly tired
b: FEAR!!!! being made to feel dumb.trying to be a better person
am awesome but struggle with listening, managing stress, and most importantly my irrational fear over money or the lack of it.
Debra Maloney says
Problems that happen on the Farm that I am not totally honest about.
The fear that things are not could go more wrong
Elle says
A. Truth-dancing with time. Time to do the big rocks of life and not majoring in minor things
B Stopping me was committing to the big rocks I place on my schedule instead of using an arrow and moving it to the next day. Being radically honest- its not eating the frog going for the quick wins first. Knowing my energy /motivation/determination depletes during the day- this needs to be done first and easy things last.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can flippantly dismiss greetings as I hate small talk.
Peter says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I’am stuck in a rut and not starting things, through fear of being burnt out, and looking after my parents and inlaw
.b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Money, time and the ability to borrow, on new projects.
Jennifer says
I think Michael wrote the answer for me to this question.
I dance around getting the house totally clean and tidy. My husband says I only ever do 80% of the job and it’s kind of true.
Like Michael I would rather be out living life. I read a quote one that said’ A clean house is a wasted life” and I was like YES OMG that it so true. I want to live life not clean my house.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I carry this thing that I am petrified of public speaking so I have joined Toastmasters and in one year I have made huge improvements but I still persist that I am petrified despite being told many times that I am fine at it. I will let this go this year and believe in my ability to speak in public.
Braden Wright says
This is actually one of my stronger qualities, I am pretty good at facing things or issues head on. I really don’t like having to not be able to talk about things straight away! I have to get it sorted out and move on, otherwise it just distracts and slows me down.
In regards with the house being clean and tidy I find that I can’t seem to function with all the other responsibilities of life without keeping on top of a clean and tidy house. Also I love being organised and having things in the right place, so when I am in a rush or under pressure I can find or use what I need straight away and get on with the bigger things!
Marija Barclay says
1) My weight – I’m in denial that I am overweight and need to do some serious action about my overeating
2) I’m scared to admit that I am not happy with my current situation – not just with weight, but also with money, relationships,, work and that deep down I do not love myself
3) I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I do not listen properly and am always interrupting conversations and going off on a tangent
Patricia says
I dance around the truth depending on the other person’s personality. It could be friend, family or colleague. If their personality is the type who likes to cause an argument because they don’t like to admit when someone has pointed something out that needs addressing, or they want to be seen to win all the time, or want to be the one who knows best all the time that stops me from attacking it directly. I don’t want to end up in WWIII just because the other person is a warmonger. I suppose I could try being concise and then following it up (or starting it off) with a positive comment first about them, and state how it would improve things if they changed what I am asking them to change to paint a positive picture and then leave quickly so they can reflect on it rather than start an argument.
I am pretty awesome, but I know I annoy people sometimes because I can be a bit too rigorous and pedantic at times – they think I don’t know when to stop, and I seem to enjoy reading into things or looking into things more than most and they find it demanding and tiresome. Then at other times I can be completely the opposite and go all gung-ho and maverick and ready for adventure with things and some people find that tiring.
Josh says
I dance around the truth and become very indirect when it comes to basically anything confrontational. I have always felt there were other ways to get something to happen, someone to listen or whatever it is even though I know for sure that being harder or more direct helps in a heap of different scenarios. I think what is stopping me from being more direct when needed is the fear of putting myself/ego out to get stomped on when it ‘should’ be able to be done another way, so I mostly avoid it.
Gav says
I dance around the truth with my wife with my property and business goals. I do this because when I have started to share in the past she reminds me of past things not seen to completion. I make it mean she has lost faith in me and our future.
I am pretty awesome but sometimes make a joke when the best thing is to try and be sensitive and listen.
Luke says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
Not enough money to visit relatives overseas.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly. Family safety concerns – hyped up by media and other.
Bonus Challenge
I annoy some people because when I am challenged in the face of nonsense I speak candidly and raise factual supportive information. This typically frustrates persons whom lack real substance.
Maree Quinn says
A. I dance all around and around the truth of my step daughter’s offensive and unnecessarily rude behaviour to myself, B – as I want to avoid conflict with my partner. Its easier now, that she lives elsewhere.
I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I can be too serious.
Ad says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
I tried my hand at investing (buying and selling) in a niche toy market and have invested a fair amount of money at it.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
With a full time job that takes around more than 45 hours a week and young kids it is hard to invest the time towards selling. Also the niche market hasn’t been lucrative due to the toy manufacturer flooding the market with reissues of their niche toys
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I dance around the issue and happily push confrontational issues under the carpet only for them to surface later in a more explosive manner. I should be less agreeable and say No more often” And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Mark Gardner says
I know I’m dancing around when I say to my wife I’m going to go to a meeting when I’m actually going out to record or learn more about the music business.
With a full time job, family ( kid) and mortgage that gives me every reason to finding it tougher to find time to do music and continue the dream .
I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I talk about music a lot and juggle so much in that short period of time ( sometimes 3-4 jobs) and work out ways to pursue the dream and here’s to a more honest ( and efficient) year ahead .
Steph says
Ok – I’m a people lover and I don’t want to hurt their feelings but with that there’s a fine line between that and being a ‘People Pleaser’
I want to learn to say what I really think to speank truth – but package it in Love I guess and not being afraid of being loved back – now I’m sounding like hipsy dipsy – but I guess that’s where its at.
YOUR CONTENT CAN BE GOOD BUT IF YOUR TONE STINKS THEN YOU’VE LOST THEPOINT OF HONESTY!
steph says
I’ve commented above – but can I be radically honest here?
I’M DOING THIS BECAUSE I REALLY NEED TO WIN THIS IPAD 🙂 my son just started at a new school in a new country and they’ve told him he needs one … the one I have is too old!! Desperate Honest Mother !!
Rita Gorlato says
I dance around the fact that I want more out of life because of upsetting my immediate family and because I know I should just go and do things I am interested in and they are not.
I tend to annoy people because I don’t give up and keep striving to achieve more
Sheila Dohnt says
I have not asked my daughter to pay us some rent for staying with us for an extended timeframe.
She is unwell and I do not want to make her worse.
Kunal says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth- To decide whether to continue with current job or go for a new one in different state
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.- Job security in the new job and comfort in the existing
David Thorpe says
Ray’s book is a great read. Thanks for the refresher. My radical honesty is that I am letting my limiting beliefs run my life. This has created the problems I am working through. I would be handling these more effectively and efficiently if I was truly honest with myself on what I must do not what others think I should do.
Kacey says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
Our renovations for our home.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
Because his father put money towards it for our wedding present so now I feel ungrateful if I disagree with anything.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because, when I get nervous or hear bad news sometimes my coping mechanism is to laugh, and can come off quite well inappropriate
Jodi taylor says
I have a property that is perfect for mark to take on but have been too scared to tell him about it in case I look like a fool as I don’t know him and i have no experience.
Jodi taylor says
I’m pretty awesome but annoy some people because I tell people the truth, and some don’t want to hear the truth. . take responsibility for you life. It is your life.
Kelli Readon says
Not being 100% happy in current personal situation.
..but… Kids come first and foremost.
Hani Fernando says
I hold back expressing my truth because I want to avoid confrontations at all costs.
Lynne Burns says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth.
that I;m not good enough or smart enough to better my life
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly.
fear, pain, failure
:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…” I try and see a positive thing out of a bad situation And here’s to a more honest (and efficient) year ahead.
Bianca says
I am not good at self discipline and I need to make some choices about my time that I can stick to. I may have to quit the job I like to give myself the time and space to create the life of my dreams.
What is stopping me is fear of not being able to create the job and life of my dreams on my own.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I can take a long time to do things”
Corrine Gough says
One area of my life that I dance around is not telling my husband everything I do with my business. I feel he lowers my energy when I have shared business ideas or things I needed to do with my beauty salon.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people when im excited I talk over the top of people or interrupt. Sorry people ?
Marie says
My beautiful kind mums husband of 30 years is and always has been a rude, nasty, bully of a man to her but is charming and nice in front of others. I just smile and pretend I do t know and put up with it because she won’t leave or do anything about it. It frustrates the hell out of me that others think he is good but behind closed doors he is just horrible. I dance around the truth to save the peace and so I can still see my mum. She has no more friends who visit her and few family will tolerate him. I am weak! I would love to kidnap her and give her a better life but she refuses to go as it will upset him. Grrrhhh!
U am awesome but my weakness and reluctance to face conflict must frustrate others. I tolerate other people’s bad behaviour too much- OMG am I like my mum!!? Food for thought!
Gina Scriven says
One area of my life that I am not truly honest about is my self worth. I give away to much of myself, and my artwork, thinking that it isn’t enough.
I am awesome and I am sorry that by shortcutting myself I am shortcutting my friends and clients around me.
tristan says
I have displayed poor time management regularly. I use the excuse of being a single full time parent of four children. For example, if I plan to do something and then one of the kids requires my attention, the thing I was doing or planning to do gets left behind and not restarted. I simply need to plan to do these things better and accept some times are simply just not good for doing anything but looking after the children. I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because I have a tendency towards hypocrisy at times. Sometimes I don’t live like the words I speak to others. I hear the words come out of my mouth and realise I need to take some of my own advice, rather than giving it to others
Recommended Website says
I’m still learning from you, but I’m trying to reach my goals. I absolutely enjoy reading all that is posted on your blog.Keep the stories coming. I liked it!
Jacki says
I have a friend who is sometimes a bit annoying on the phone as she tends to treat me like I’m a bit dim. Not sure I want to do anything about it tho, I find it almost amusing.
And I know I annoy some people because I take a lot of time to decide things.
Graham Cooper says
One of the areas I “dance around” is being honest with Myself.
I need to STOP blaming; The Media, The Banks, The Economy and The Government for all my woes.
If it’s meant to be…it’s up to me….to find a way around the issues at hand.
Ok, This is easy for me because I have been aware of it for some time.
I am pretty flipping awesome but, I TALK TOO MUCH !
it has it very positive side because most of my customers (97% in fact)..I did a survey.
they say that I am an amazing vestibule of knowledge and common sense !
BUT…. I say….I TALK TOO MUCH
and don’t listen enough…or ask enough questions.
Ange says
a. Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth – that I am organised. Everyone thinks I am but I’m aware that although I have made an effort in the last couple of months, a lot of my paperwork is unorganised and I don’t research as deeply as I should when working.
b. Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly – I think I feel a bit overwhelmed by it all but I know when I get things done I’m able to relax much more.
Bonus Challenge
Complete this sentence:
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…I can be a bit bossy and forget to flower up my communication.
Richard says
Plan my day and stick to it.
Get organised and finish tasks one at a time
J says
1 On the outside I come across as being very cool, calm and collected. I’m not always that on the inside.
2 Need to open up to reveal what my true feelings are – which will show that I’m not always – cool, calm and collected.
Bonus Challenge: I’m pretty flipping awesome, butI know I annoy some people because …. I’m too much of a perfectionist and try to do things right all the time instead of just ‘doing it’
Danielle Kelly says
I dance around the truth about my feelings for my friends boyfriend. The guy has been a complete jerk to her in the past and I don’t know that he’s capable of changing. I haven’t said anything more to her about this recently because I don’t want push her away, especially now that they are expecting a child together.
Nathan says
Confronting unhealthy behaviour – because I don’t want to be embroiled in the problem.
“I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because…”
I overcommit because the best part of a task is exploring, understanding and starting it, rather than finishing it 🙂
Inna says
Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth – Not being honest with myself.
Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly – fear to face the truth, fear to realise that so many years of life were wasted.
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because – sometimes I am getting too much emotional and start talking over people.
Adriana says
Identify one area of your life where you are dancing around the truth – not confronting my troublesome boss
Identify what it is that is stopping you from attacking it directly – fear of confrontation and losing my job
I am pretty flipping awesome, but I know I annoy some people because – I cant say no and worry too much about what other people think of me.
Saidah says
Telling my hubby something that might tick him off.
Working on this one and depends on how l feel.
Hmmm
Pauline says
A. Holding my tongue when my staff don’t quite finish the job properly and I end up just thinking that it is easier to do it myself and then I quietly fix up the problems.
B. Not fear of confrontation but more a general disappointment in peoples ‘that will do attitude’.
I am pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy some people because I rarely stop and relax as I like to be on the go.
ALISON says
Kidding myself I am studying hard and doing all the work when I know I’m only skimming over it and getting side-tacked all the time.
Basically I’m lazy and impatient, wanting the successful outcome to magically appear.
ALISON says
I’m pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy people when I talk over them.
ScottB says
Having a long distance relationship, trying to bring BIG issues up, but also want to enjoy our time.
Trying to maintain the integrity & honesty I have & also not being honest with myself & my needs.
I’m pretty flipping awesome but I know I annoy people when I’m not being present & in the moment.
Brett says
My partner is blatantly passive-aggressive, one disagreement leads to all out arguments.
We need to address the communication issues to diffuse this!